About 5 years ago I was in a really bad car wreck! I lost some of my memory, a stuttering problem occurred, and I had many other problems develop.
One specifically was my anxiety. I will admit, I had some anxiety before the wreck; but it wasn’t horrible. I could live with it.
But after the wreck, my anxiety jumped to be at an all-time high.
I didn’t want to leave the house. Being around people made me tremble and fill up with fear.
I remember one day I was out grocery shopping. I was out just a little bit too late than usual. The busy 5 o’clock traffic started to pour into the store. I had my cart and was trying to get down the aisles. It seemed like I was trying to dodge giants “beasts” from every which way. I couldn’t breath. My heart started to pound and I froze.
I backed up into a corner of the store. I placed the cart diagonally in front of me and just sat down on the ground covering my ears. The basket was my barrier to protect me from the “beast”, and my knees were my curtain to hide in.
I cried so hard.
It took me a while to deal with this. Doctors kept trying to put me on medicine but it never made me feel good. If anything, it made me feel worse. I would feel numb and not myself. I was tired of trying these medicines every month.
I decided to stop and fight the big anxiety monster myself with my own rules. Eventually I found the antidote; and it was right under my nose the whole time.
My father and mother are very artistic. I grew up drawing and winning many awards as a child. Growing up I loved to sit at home on a Friday night and draw until 4 am rather than having a friend come over or going out.
Drawing was magic to me.
One day I came home very upset from a busy day at the store filled with the “monster people”. I wanted to jump in my bed and cry. When I walked into my room I saw an old, unfinished drawing of mine. It had a tiny bit of color but needed about 75% more to be complete. I am not sure what compelled me so, but I just grabbed the unfinished drawing along with my prisma colors.
I took both of these items and sat down at my desk and just started to color. I remember watching the color go down onto the paper. I was mesmerized with how the prism color applied to beautiful with each stroke. I lifted my head up after I thought about 15 minutes had passed, but in actuality, hours had passed by and I didn’t even notice.
I was calm and so relaxed.
A big grin stretched over my face. I had finished the piece and I had finished fighting my inner demon. Since discovering how much coloring calms me down — I haven’t stopped.
My anxiety has shriveled up and I feel I can conquer the world. This has driven me to draw more so I can color more often to get these stresses out. With every piece I get stronger as an artist and a person. I have never been more confident in myself nor this happy. I couldn’t be more thankful.
All I can ask now is, why do you color?
I would love to learn why you enjoy it. Don’t be shy! No answer is right or wrong. I would love to learn about you! Let’s get to know each other and continue to support one another! Let’s build our art, our confidence, and our friendship!
Best, Devin (coloring artist here on thecoloringbook.club)
(Write your answer in the comments, thanks)